Just like everyone else in the past two years I jumped on the TikTok bandwagon.
I’ve found so many cool brands, funny content creators, life/mom inspiration — Elyse Myers — cleaning hacks, or videos that make me feel okay with my hot mess life.
More often than not my house is not clean, laundry is piled up a mile high, my ADHD has 20 different projects going on, I catch myself staring out the window thinking about something someone said 5 years ago that still upset me, and my to-do list is a 20 meters long.
One video that stood out the past couple of weeks was Taylor Michele — @taylorxmichele — video on going through the past two years alone. The video hit home for me. I posted the video below, so feel free to watch the video before reading the rest of this post.
You finished the video? Great now let me give my thoughts. Please don’t take this post personally in any way, and/or think it’s me complaining.
A little bit of background here, if you’re new here. I grew up as an only child my only close family has since passed, and my remaining family I’m not close with.
Before the pandemic, I worked full time outside of the home, I ate lunch with someone every day, two or three times a week I’d grab drinks with a friend, and the weekends were filled with playdates or events. Even though I’m an introvert I’m a very social creature with those I know.
Fast forward to the pandemic; just like everyone else, I was thrust into this home lifestyle. I went into the pandemic with a new job I was trying to navigate, a kindergartner I was trying to homeschool, freelancing for clients trying to figure out their businesses, and mentoring students who had no clue what was going on in their school or home life. On top of that, I was only going to therapy for 30 minutes every other week. I was trying to stay connected with friends through zoom, doing happy hours, and talking with my co-workers to get social interaction.
It’s been one wild two years’ that’s something we can all agree on. And as the two years have gone on I’ve been able to see a couple of my friends, and I’ve made new friendships where I’ve been able to hang out with others. And I’m very thankful for that.
But, as Taylor mentions in their video people who went through these two years alone there is a line between enjoying alone time and being socially isolated. Yea, I went through these two years with a child at home, but it’s not like I can say “I had a REALLY rough day at work” or “the ceiling leaking, how are we going to afford this”. A young child cannot always comprehend how bills are due on this date, a paycheck only goes every other week, the washer just broke, and they want a new toy.
In these two years, I had to learn how to hold everything in during the day, then self-soothe in the evening after bedtime. Yea, therapy is a great tool — I go every single week — but that doesn’t help at 5 pm when a client needs a fix, and you need to get to swim in 30 minutes.
They mention how they are at the point in their lives where everyone else is moving on with their lives, and it’s not the same. I can relate. The two close friends I do have also mention how they are at the point in their lives where everyone else is moving on with their lives, and it’s not the same. The rest of my friends have moved on; they are in long-term relationships, getting married, having kids, or about to have more. And I’m so happy for them, and I’ll always be their biggest fans.
At the end of the day, they all can plop on the couch turn to the side, and say “ugh I had the roughest day” or throughout the day text “ugh you won’t believe this”. While the rest of us have to text ourselves, have a conversation with Alexa, or just toil in our mind pit.
Again, don’t take this post as a complaint. This post is just to raise awareness that a number of us are going through this alone, and we don’t have a partner, mom, or friend to turn to.
Everyone is busy, everyone has something going on, but it takes less than 10 seconds to text to check in on a friend. For you, that text could mean nothing — to the person sitting alone with their thoughts it could change their day.
Today — I challenge you to text a friend who you haven’t spoken to while. Please don’t just say “Hey” or “What’s up?”; text them a random fact, a note about a tv show that just came out, or any topic the two of you can engage on. Get them talking and if they live close maybe ask them to join you for a coffee or lunch.
Remember No one is an island.
Keep Reading
- In the wake of a global pandemic, loneliness has become a crisis of its own
- Pandemic increasing risk factors for suicide, UN health agency warns
- Managing my mental health during stay-at-home orders
- Feeling low during the pandemic? Expert says you’re not alone and shares what can help
- Managing Your Mental Health in the Third Year of the Pandemic
- Support The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
- Not Everyone’s Your Friend